Fast growing tumor= Immediate action.
On December 9th, I was not only having my port placement procedure done, but beginning my first round of chemotherapy. I was extremely nervous. I put on my brave face for those around me, but underneath it all I thought my heart was going to jump out of my chest. The waiting room was packed and the longer I waited, the more nervous I became.
This was going to be a long day and I knew I needed to shake the nerves. I took a minute to go to the bathroom where I said a quick prayer. ” Lord, give me peace, give me strength. I know You’ve got me. Amen”
I returned to the waiting room and before I had a chance to settle back in my seat, I was called back and greeted by my cousin Angie’s smiling face. That prayer paired with her infectious positive energy definitely put my mind at ease. I was glad to see a familiar face and after she had me all checked in I returned to another waiting room to begin preparing for the procedure. I was hoping I would be asleep during the process, but instead I was given valium to help me relax.
I laid there still with my eyes shut tight. I could feel a lot of pressure and hear the people fast at work around me. I just wanted it to be over. I have no idea how long I was on the table, I just remember someone standing over me saying, ” you’re all set. How are you feeling?” I was loopy. My first attempt at stepping down from the table was a no go.
Once I finally got my balance, I went to dress and head off to my first round of chemo. I arrived at the doctor’s office and got all checked in before heading back to the treatment area.
This was chemo?
I walked back, not knowing what to expect and was surprised to see rows of recliners. Some people were laid back, wrapped up in their blankets reading, while others watched one of several TVs in the back. It was nothing like I expected. It was refreshing to see people smiling. No one looked depressed. In fact, everyone was so full of positive energy. I kept hearing (as I have been through out the entire process) “You’re so young.”
Of course, I never thought at 28 that I would be sitting back in a recliner watching a nurse prepare my chemo meds, but I was there and it was happening and I was there fighting to get better like everyone else.
My treatment took a little over 4 hours. When treatment was over, I felt like all the energy had been sucked out of my body, BUT I had done it. I had made it through round 1 of 6 treatments. The nurse gave me a long list of medicines I would be taking throughout the process. I was one step closer to getting better. I just kept telling myself that the fight is already fixed. I walked out of the Dr’s office exhausted but ready for whatever was up next.
I've always believed that we tend to be the most effective in areas where we have been the most affected. It's often our deepest pains that draw us closer to our purpose. Those words never really hit home until I was diagnosed with stage 2 breast cancer at the age of 28. I had watched both my mother and grandmother battle the disease, but never thought I would find myself in the same battle, especially not so young. I've learned through this journey that it's not what you go through, but how you go through it. I wanted to share my story in hopes that it will inspire someone to keep fighting, keep the faith and live on purpose.